Fed-up! Yes! Frustrated! Yes! Want to scream very hard oh bloody yes! I went to my plastic surgeon appointment with a smile only to be told about the NHS and the new reforms.
It was only a matter of time before I felt its grasp of despair. The registrar said I need further tweaks, but their hands are tied thanks to these new funding regulations. If I am to have any further corrective surgery I must make an appointment with my GP who may refer me because they hold the purse strings. Oh yes the new NHS reform strikes hard into the hearts of women who already face a hard slog to except their new body image. Oh please! Who voted these buffoons in because it sure as hell was not me!
When you have your first review you are told that you may need tweaks and the first time does not always work, but under the new reform it does not take this into consideration. Any further corrective surgery unless urgent is seen as non essential and it is left to the GP to decide whether it should take place. Personally I’d love to lop off a certain prime ministers penis and say look first attempt fella sorry no go purse strings are tied!
The registrar could do nothing but apologise. An appointment was made for four weeks time so I can speak to Mr H, but in the meantime I will go on the waiting list for nipple reconstruction because that is part of my treatment. Thankfully my GP has a guilty conscience from misdiagnosing me in the first place. So if I choose to try and have further surgery to correct my now lopsided breast he may refer. I’ll just have to batter my baby blues and believe there is a guardian angel out there. Either that or divorce my husband and find me a sugar daddy who can pay for the work to be done PVT.
The truth of the matter is I’m already fighting the effects of age and gravity with both breasts. So whatever tweaking is done won’t last long. I just wish my husband was as acceptant of my situation as I am. His reply on returning home was, but they have put the new reform on hold and that the registrar had got it wrong. Then a sharp right I have to go we’ll talk later mid way through conversation. Yes he was really interested in what I had to say. I just wish he had said some reassuring words of support before he vanished.
The first steps of breast cancer and its affects leave you numb. It is pure guess work to how you fair from the treatment you receive. Like the registrar said today, be thankful that you had zero infection and no recurrence, but what about the aftermath? I am left with a wonky breast so do remind me of the reasons why should I be thankful again? Oh yes! we are constantly reminded we are alive, but it does little for my self esteem let alone other women going through the same shitty hell. How can you move forward when you’re forever looking in a mirror? Time is ticking away, but you are stood motionless like a rabbit caught in head lights. Thankfully we have clothes that cover the truth. I say this with pure sarcasm...
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